Joining the Gulf Winds e-group

 

By Jack McDermott

 
Well after two long years the computer gurus at my state agency finally figured out a way for me to get on the gulf winds e-group. (I said they work for the State … not Microsoft).

My current running group, the Sunday Streakers, have already started a betting pool as to how long it will take before I get kicked off the e-group. I think the bookies have the current odds at 3-to-1 that I’ll last 2 weeks, so if you are interested in placing a wager, please contact Paul Hiers.

Or here’s an idea … maybe we can make the Gulf-Winds e-group like that “Survivor” show on CBS. Every week we would all try to decide who whines the most, tells the worst jokes, is generally the most annoying, or does the least work for the club and vote them off the e-group. Instead of a million dollars the winner will get their entry fee for the Tallahassee Marathon waived.

Well … I have only been on a week, and already I have found the gulf-winds e-group VERY useful … especially David Yon’s e-mails. For example, if I ever find myself suffering from insomnia … and awake at 4 o’clock in the morning … and I happen to flip on ESPN2 … I now know who to “root for” in the Zimbabwe National Women’s 5,000 Meter Olympic Trials. Go, Sedenia Telanadajouiu !!!!!! Honestly … I am having so much trouble keeping track of all these African runners with unpronounceable names! I think it should be a requirement that if they win prize money in the United States, they should be obligated to designate a cheesy American nickname like “Skip” or “Muffy” so we can more easily keep tabs on them. (Especially if they all keep applying for American citizenship!)

No … if God wanted me to watch all those races on ESPN2 he would have created VCRs. Or rather … VCRs that I can figure out how to use. Actually, does anyone in the e-group have a VCR? Mine keeps flashing “12:00”. Does that mean it’s recording?!?! Some input would be helpful.

I also couldn’t help but notice that Gary Griffen has asked for suggestions to improve the Tallahassee Marathon (Big mistake … Gary). I also can’t help but notice that so many of the comments so far have been positive (That’s about to change). I’m trying to formulate something more specific than, “The best way to improve the Tallahassee Marathon is to not run it in Tallahassee …”

I almost ruptured my spleen last year running those Killearn Hills (in the “half”), and having to run all those extra “fingers” to add distance! Let’s just say after I finished that race I was ready to give the race director … “the finger”. Needless to say I should be a wealth of information when it comes to improving the race. (So what’s our budget? Do we have enough money to do landscaping?). My full response regarding the infamous Tallahassee Marathon is being formulated ….. stay tuned!